Saturday, October 22, 2005

Have decided that therapy and pills are worth a go and intend to contact someone soon. How does one go about this anyway? Have also decided to "take my fertility into own hands" which sounds very feminist and affirmative.

Things I am thinking about now:
  • Can I love a donor egg baby the way I love my daughter?
  • Is acupuncture just a bunch of hooey? Worth a try for fertility?
  • Can I ditch my book contract without incurring legal wrath and financial pain inflicted by publisher?
  • What can be done with a Ph.D. in a social science that doesn't involve teaching?
  • When did I start to hate teaching? Or maybe it is just the publish or perish I hate. Yes, that may be it.
  • Why can't I sleep?
  • What jackpot did I win to have cancer, spinal surgery and chronic pain, and infertility all in my 30s? Do bad things happen to good people, or am I a bad person?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Thank you for writing your thoughts. I just found out today that I too failed the Clomid Challenge. I have had 2 pg, but have no living children. My son died a year ago...2 hours after he was born at 22 wks gestation. After losing 2 children, having chronic pain (interstitial cystitis and pelvic floor tension myalgia)…I thought my bad news was over. The only thing that kept me going after losing my son was that I could have more…now it doesn’t look good for that either. Guess my way of saying…I can relate to how you were feeling in Oct. ’05 when you wrote this…hopefully you have a success story.